There are so many things that bring great joy to us as mothers but with that comes guilt too. That we aren’t enough. Are they watching too much tv? Are they eating well enough? Do I have them in enough activities? Are they spoiled? Literally the list can go on and on. I have been struggling with my own shame of failing my son. I was so frustrated by his outbursts and behavior that I started to push him away because of my own frustrations of failing to figure him out. Not abuse or even neglect, just distance.
Add that to my list of guilt.
Guilt, there is plenty to go around. However I am going to take credit. I am going to take credit for the fact that while it may have taken me longer than he deserved to see the light I have figured it out and I am taking steps to help. It took one scan of an article for the light bulb to blink on.
Duh, it takes one to know one!
So how does and anxious person parent the anxious. Easy, my anxiety goes something like this,
He’s upset and making a scene. Oh my god, is he going to be made fun of? Will he fit in? Other parents think I’m a terrible mother! I’m failing as a mom!
Fortunately I got my head out of my ass and was able to hear what he was actually telling me during his episodes. It won’t be an overnight change but at least we know what we are dealing with which is good, because this little boy
deserves the best!
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