One for the Books

I waited a couple days to write this post. You know, so that I can look back and laugh. It took a couple days.

This post is about Mothers Day.

Since I always have to work on Sunday we celebrate Mothers and Fathers Day on the Saturday before.

I can go into the gory details. But I’ll give you an overview.  Mine started with Little Moo waking me sometime before 7am. Way before. He shoved a handmade gift in my face and said “Happy Mothers Day!” then asked to watch TV. Sadly we had been having a week long room cleaning standoff and he wasn’t allowed television until his room was cleaned. Any guesses on what this will mean for the day? Here’s a hint, he wasn’t happy about this consequence. And he let me know. All. Day. I was lucky enough to drop him and Littlest Moo off with Grammy for a few hours only to drag a zombie Zippercow around to local nurseries. Then have the kids shout at me some more, fight, not listen. Little Moo shouted at one point “Mothers Day is when moms are supposed to be nice to their kids!” At one point he threw a tantrum and slammed our slider door and managed to shatter the glass. Then yelled at me some more about his consequences. I cried (a couple times) that day. Sunday after work wasn’t much better. I can safely say the most pleasant time of the weekend was being at work.

It’s my own fault really. I thought that since things have been rough and I’ve had a lot  to deal with since Zippercow has been not well that maybe it might just be a little more special. But duh, he’s still not well so he didn’t really have the energy to pull off his usual magic (he’s usually really good at this sort of thing) let alone add that little something extra. I tried not to get my hopes up, but let’s be honest, I did.

Fortunately for my husband and boys, I know they love me. I know they appreciate me. And we can laugh about it now, the terrible mothers day. The post is not meant to make my husband or boys feel bad. The idea was to share that no matter what, I still love them. Even on the bad days.

Always.

Oh and next year, feel free to make it extra special!

Stuck.

My weight loss journey is…stuck. In the mud. Like, a lot of it. It is frustrating me to no end. I am not really sure how to get my motivation back. I was doing so well, then the holidays came and I just enjoyed myself and now I can’t seem to get back on track. I gained a few pounds back and despite my work I can’t seem to get any traction. I loose a few, then gain them back and am staying pretty static.

With Zippercow being sick for the better half of a year (just one issue compounded on another and another) the stress is definitely taking its toll on me. I shouldn’t let it but measuring food, planning meals and journaling what I eat seems so easy to let go of with all the stress. I haven’t gone crazy with my eating but clearly my choices haven’t been great. I’ve been motivated enough to keep up at the gym and am back to doing weights regularly, but it still isn’t enough. Some days I’m proud that despite the stress I haven’t gone all the way back, that I’ve kept some habits and still have enough sense not to let bags of cookies, chips and candy into my home, But then I get into a social situation and can’t hold back. In the past I would have just let it all go, that’s how I got so heavy in the first place. So, I am proud, proud that even in stressful times I can keep some of my shit  together. Then other days I’m pissed at my weak will. Why didn’t I say no to those cookies on the counter at work (but damn, my coworker makes kickass cookies!)?   And why does a free day or treat turn into a whole weekend of it? I had plans to be at my goal weight by my brother’s wedding (the end of summer) and that goal keeps slipping further and further away.

I’ve also got the added complication of Zippercow’s diet. His diet is SO limited that it requires us to get him certain foods even if they aren’t on sale, which is a stretch on our food budget, but the guy has to eat!  So I frequently skip getting some of the foods that help me to eat healthy.

So…any ideas? I know what I NEED to do but can’t seem to find the motivation. What do you do when you need a burst of motivation? Is it this difficult for everyone? Have you ever stalled for a bit and gotten back on track? I’d love to hear your thoughts!

Budding Engineer

Our Littlest Moo has taken to trains lately and loves building his Duplo tracks. But it is not just enough to put the tracks together, he has to make them better!

 

Who doesn’t want tracks that rise and fall!? Sadly, these are not designed for such ingenuity.

I think I can, I think I can, and then I can’t.

Being a toddler is hard.